Who is “we?”  Have you ever heard statements like these at home and work:  “We should really do something about that!” “We need to make a decision‚” “We should get this done by Friday‚” “We need to do a better job of keeping the house clean.”

“We” has you leaving the conversation wondering who’s we, and whose doing what?  It also can be interpreted as a passive tactic, of not asserting what you really feel/think/believe, or a defensive move for avoiding conflict or responsibility.  Either way, it leads to miscommunication.

So here is what you can do if “we” shows up in conversation.   First, trust intentions.  Stay curious, wanting and waiting to listen and understand.  Second, openly, and without opinion or assumption, ask for clarification.  (If you’ve already formed an opinion, judgment or assumption, it’s tough to be truly open.)

If you have been trained in the Process Communication Model (PCM), you know we are also talking about using appropriate parts and channels (what’s in front of you?) in how you ask for clarification.

Rest assured that if you do nothing, “we” will keep hanging around and tasks will never get completed… because “we” doesn’t do anything.  A frog could get more done.  If you want to know more about the PCM, give us a shout. Ribbit.

Submitted by:

In the coming year, look for the continuing evolution of PCM with Next Element.  Our passion is to help you communicate for a change!

-NR

Read Seth Godin’s entire blog post…

Tools vs insight

How is your vocabulary? It’s a vital tool, certainly. Do you know these words?
a, after, and, as, die, eternal, first, gets, gun, have, in, is, job, life, me, mouth, my, pushing, saying, step, that, the, to, Tyler, waiter, you.

How about these?
a, am, and, anywhere, are, be, boat, box, car, could, dark, do, eat, eggs, fox, goat, good, green, ham, here, house, I, if, in, let, like, may, me, mouse, not, on, or, rain, Sam, say, see, so, thank, that, the, them, there, they, train, tree, try, will, with, would, you.

The first list contains every word in the opening lines from Fight Club, the second is the entire word list from Green Eggs and Ham.  Of course, neither you nor I wrote either of these, regardless of how well trained we are in what the words (the tools) mean.

Knowing about a tool is one thing. Having the guts to use it in a way that brings art to the world is another. Perhaps we need to spend less time learning new tools and more time using them.

from:  http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2011/12/tools-and-insight.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+typepad%2Fsethsmainblog+%28Seth%27s+Blog%29

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FEATURED CLIENT

Our featured client this month is Meramec Adventure Learning Ranch in Eastern Missouri.  Brett Bailey, director shares in this article, “Next Element has taught us how to more effectively bridge the transfer-of-learning gap, which is essential to the work Meramec offers its young participants.  We give youth the ability to recognize they have something unique and special to offer.  I believe that inspires a lot of purpose, which goes a long way toward developing efficacy and hope.”  Click here to read the article.

WHITE PAPER

There are a number of things that our parents told us when we were growing up that are not true, things like, “If you do not eat your green beans you will not grow up to be big and strong.”  However, one of the many things that they told us that is true: “You can do anything you put your mind to.”  This is why we like to say: “own your potency,” and this is how we define it: own and acknowledge your efficacy, effectiveness and strengths. Owning your potency is how you achieve success. Click here to read more of Jeff’s thoughts on this subject.

PCM NUGGET

Conditional vs. Positional – It’s a Matter of Degree! For more on the difference between first and second degree distress, check out this blog post…

NE CORNER

We celebrate and welcome new NEOS® users: Kathleen Friesen, Friesen Group, North Newton, KS; Michelle Axell and Jennifer Nelson, ID 287Plymouth, MN. And new PCM® trainers, Jason Leal, Prairie View, Newton, KS and Donald Morris, Savvis, St. Louis, MO.

PLAY TIME

Last month we asked “What three words could change your life?”  What we were looking for: “Need, But, and See” – as shared in Jeff’s White Paper. We neglected to specify “if you never use them again,” so we received a lot of inspiring and fun submissions. (Thank you!)
- I love you
- Impossible is nothing
- Process Communication Model
- I was wrong
- Your life matters
- I am pregnant
- Open, Persistent, Resourceful
- You are hired!

And, the first person who gave us the answer we were looking for was Carolyn Wilhelm, CFO of Kidron Bethel Village in North Newton, KS.

We learned a little lesson about communication ourselves with that one!

For December, we will give $100 to the person who submits the most compelling reply to Jeff’s white paper on Owning Your Potency… All entries must be submitted as comments on this page of our website.

GOT PROCESS POLL

New question… visit gotprocess.com, scroll to the bottom of the page and place your VOTE!!  “What is life like when you have Reactor-Persister as your base-phase combo?” vs. “What is life like when you have Workaholic-Persister as your base-phase combo?”

UPCOMING SEMINARS

We hope you’ll take advantage of the special 20% discount, exclusively for our clients and friends, to join Nate’s Lorman Education audio conference on February 14.  The title is “Effective Techniques for Productive Meetings”  Click here to learn more.

And… due to popular demand, we have added a PCM Core Competency Training to our schedule, January 11 – 13 in Newton KS.  This one is filling up fast, we hope you’ll reserve your spot soon!

Are you a PCM Trainer?  We’re offering an exclusive NEOS Certification just for you!  Join Jerome Lefeuvre from France and the Pauley’s from Maryland, January 19 – 20 event in Newton KS.

We would love to see you in one of our workshops at the Association for Challenge Course Technology’s (ACCT) Annual International Conference in Boston, MA – February 9 – 12.  Discover more on our website!

Facilitating Self-Efficacy – March 7 – 18, Newton KS

NEOS Certification – March 9, Newton KS

Visit our calendar often for upcoming seminars and events!

“I have been to a number of self help, motivational and improvement seminars during my career.  This by far outranks them all.  Very worthwhile investment of my time. Wish I had this information 20 years ago.”  - Dan Roberson, Exec. Broker, PDC Companies,  Little Rock, AR

    PocketPCM

Don’t leave home (or for some, go home) without it.

HOT WINGS UPDATE

Brian Kenady, outdoor education student at Georgia College, is enjoying some tasty Irish Whiskey Glazed wings at Fionn MacCools in Jacksonville, FL during the AEE international conference. These wings were doggone good!

We’re throwing down a challenge for 2012.  How many of these top ten places will we get wing sightings from y’all?

FEATURED CLIENT

Our featured client this month is Kidron Bethel Village, a retirement village in North Newton KS.  Read how they increased communication effectiveness by 20 – 40% in six key areas.  The article can be read in its entirety by clicking here.

PCM NUGGET

“PCM leaves no-one indifferent because it is so pertinent, complete, and predictive” – Jerome Lefeuvre, Kahler Communication France

From California to Michigan, Vermont to Florida, and right here in the Midwest our experience has been the same as in France. PCM is transformative. We will continue to expand the reach and impact of PCM, innovate, and explore the depths of what this tool can do.

CONTEST

The first person to reply to this question correctly, “What three words could change your life?” will win a $25 gift card of their choice. (This prize has already been awarded)

GOT PROCESS POLL

And the winner is…How can I adapt my communication style and stay authentic?  Authenticity isn’t just about “sticking to your guns.”  Being yourself is about being all you are, accessing all your potential and qualities to be effective with others. Read more by clicking here.

UPCOMING SEMINARS

• Process Facilitation Seminar – Nov 14 – 16, Newton KS
• NEOS Certification – Nov 15 – 16, Newton KS
• Advanced PCM® Conflict Resolution Seminar – Nov 17 – 18, Newton KS
• PCM® Trainer Certification – Nov 28 – Dec 2, Newton KS
• To register, or find out more about any of these seminars, click here.

Here is a blushworthy quote from an attendee of a Process Communication Model Seminar hosted by the greater Wichita area Young Presidents’ Organization…

“I say modern life is conceived through communication. Have you ever moved an object without touching it? That is influence. That is what Nate & Jeff did.“  – Mark Hamade,  Chief Operating Officer at PKM Steel, Salina Steel, MSS Transport

If you haven’t purchased the PocketPCM from your local apps store yet, what are you waiting for?  This handy-dandy, at-your-fingertips communication tool may be just the thing you could use for one of those “awkward moments” at those upcoming holiday parties!

In case you missed it Nate’s article, “Problem Employees: Invest in them or invite them out,” was recently published by the Wichita Eagle.  Click here to read the complete article.

• We’re Three Today!
• Upcoming Events
• Lessons From an Unlikely Hero
• We Hope to See You At… (AEE & ACCT)
• Ask Process Man
• PocketPCM

• Featured Client: Ranlyn Hill, Benevolent Vision
• Challenge Winner: Marja Brandon, Brandon Consulting Group
• PCM Nugget: First Break All the Rules
• Invest or Invite Out
• Nate is now a Certifying Process Education Model Trainer!
• Upcoming Events
• See You Soon: At SHRM Conference, ExpoSure and AEE International Conference
• Hot Wings Update: Joe’s on Sullivan in Atlanta

~  Judith Ann Pauley, Ph.D., CEO, Process Communications, Inc.

Contact us with questions or to learn about upcoming certifications.

The Assessing Matrix: Tools for dealing with personality differences in the workplace.

SHRM State Conference, Hyatt Regency, Wichita, KS

September 15: 9:45 – 11:15 AM

Click here for conference details.

Visit our booth to learn about Next Element and get some cool free stuff!!

• Why would a Reactor procrastinate?
• Nate and ISD 287 Minneapolis
• Wichita Chamber Exposure
• Featured Client: Tracy Weber, Kaleidoscope Learning Circle
• Quote from Michigan School Principal
• Upcoming Events
• Hot Wing Update, Courtesy of Rita Knoblauch
• Back to School Challenge
• PCM and Childhood Behavior Disorders
• PocketPCM